Living in the present

I’ve been paying attention to how much of my waking time I spend doing something other than being in the present moment. At first glance, it may not seem that important to live in the present in your life. But think: every peak moment in your life happens in the present moment. Go back (yes, to the past) and recall: when were you the happiest? When did you feel most connected to the world? What are your most cherished memories? They come from an almost indescribable moment in time where you were present to all that was happening within you and around you, and you felt totally, completely alive. In the present moment. Not when you were remembering what happened yesterday, or last year, or a decade ago. Not when you are planning for tomorrow, or dreaming of next year, or imagining how wonderful it will be when this or that particular dream comes true.

Your joy happens in real time. Your sorrow happens now, as well. In fact, it all happens now. When you feel sadness at something that happened in the past, it’s really your thoughts about what happened that cause the feelings. And when is it that your thoughts happen? In the present moment.

If I had some sort of measuring device, I think it would show that about 75% of the time I am thinking about the past, which is gone, over, done with, never to be seen again. About 24% of the time I’m imagining a future that may never arrive, dreaming, planning, following long imaginary conversations to some conclusion that is SO not real, and I get lost in it. The scant 1% left over is what I devote to my ‘real’ life, as it is happening with me (to me?) right now: how I feel, what I’m seeing and hearing, what people are saying and doing, how I relate to others in my world. Just being generally useful and kind. (Or unhelpful and grumpy — it depends.) I’m uneasy with that 1% figure. I’ve heard that life is what’s happening while you’re busy making plans. Indeed.

A mindfulness meditation practice can help us be more gentle with ourselves, but at the same time, to notice when our minds wander to the past or the future. My mind goes off on its own, habitually, and makes up stories: I say this and then she says that and takes this thingamajig and throws it over there, and I say ‘Well! Hmmph!’ and off my mind goes until I notice that I’ve gone somewhere else and gently say, ‘Hey. Come back. Focus on right here, now, in this moment.’

It’s amusing, really. I find it hard to hold my attention deliberately in the present moment for more than a couple of seconds. Once my mind wanders off, it can be off on a jolly for many minutes before I realize it and call my mind back to Now. I have to laugh. It’s just the way our minds work. But if we can develop a bit more awareness of how our thoughts take on a life of their own, we can feel quite a bit more patience with ourselves, and with others. And our compassion will grow too. And that’s a good thing.

2 thoughts on “Living in the present”

  1. It’s a scary thing to live in the moment, every waking moment of your life. I mean, what if it took you out of your comfort zone? And kept you outside of it, day after day after day? It’s safe to let the mind dwell on the past; it’s also safe to let the mind play with the future. Anything but following your bliss, your passion, your excitement, your inspiration, moment by moment. That is just too scary, don’t you think? Better to play it safe and stick with your daily routines. Living in the moment is too unpredictable, too unstable, too insecure for most of us. And yet, as you suggested, living in the moment is where you’ll find all the fun! The adventures! The opportunities! What a strange and curious paradox.

  2. Thanks, Christopher. It looks like you and I share a lot of similar interests! I think people often may not realise that living more in the present is the secret to a happy life. Once you decide that’s the way you want to be in the world, then of course, all the stuff you mention here is potentially blocking your way.

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